It's been a coupla days, I tell you. I feel really drained, but productive, so I guess that's a good thing? The scary thing is the week isn't even over for me, I still have so much to do >.<
i. On Sunday, dad was discharged from hospital. I went to get him from the hospital, and he really didn't look too great. When we were waiting in the reception area of the hospital, two of the receptionists asked me if he'd discharged himself, because he didn't look good at all, and they didn't think he should be going home. I explained that he was still feeling awful but the doctors discharged him. They asked if I wanted them to phone the ward and tell the staff they were concerned, so of course I said yes, happy that someone outside of our family was seeing how ill he was. We waited a bit, then a porter came down and took us back to the ward. We ended up sitting in the ward for about 4 hours. The nurses all told us the same as they always say, which is annoying because they never explain anything. They just say, "the tests don't show anything, so we can't do anything," and it's like, yes, I get that, but there is some reason that he's in the mess he is.
They ended up doing some repeat tests on him, and said he could stay another night but that there was nothing else they could do, so it would be the same situation the next day. We were waiting around for the doctor to come and speak to us, and the fucking drama in the ward. I almost lost my shit.
Y'all know I don't judge anyone by their addictions, however there are some people who just disgust me - like the guy in the bed opposite my dad who actually offered him cocaine and heroin the night before, proudly informed me and my dad he was saving up his valium so he could get 'full of it' later that night, and was just unpleasant as hell. It all came to a head when he started snapping at a nurse who was strapping up his fingers because he'd broken his hand. Now, the specialist said to strap up his fingers because, you know, THEY'RE A PROFESSIONAL. However, this guy seemed to think he knew better because his mum is apparently a retired nurse. The nurse politely said that perhaps his mother wasn't up to date on the current medical practises (they did used to put a cast on a broken hand, but it doesn't help it heal) and this guy went MENTAL and started to accuse the nurse of bringing down his mother, started to call her names, and said, "I'll get fucking nasty on you," which is a threat, so the nurse said she wasn't treating him anymore, she was reporting him, and left. During the argument in which this guy was so rude, nasty, and just down right dickish another nurse had been standing there, obviously to make sure her colleague was okay, and they both were looking at me like, do you see what we need to deal with? and I was just shaking my head and clenching my jaw, giving the guy bad looks because how DARE he threaten a nurse...how dare he threaten A WOMAN?! He wouldn't have spoken to a male nurse like that, I'll guarantee you that. The second nurse actually said, "there's a young lady in this ward, and I don't think she wants to hear that kind of language, have some respect," because I think the dude had forgotten I was there, as there was one of those large wheelchair-type-things between us.
Then, the head nurse came in to find out what was going on and asked why he threatened her staff, and the arsehole actually said, "I didn't, I've got two witnesses!" Me and another guy in the ward (Tam, such a lovely guy, my dad added him on Facebook, haha!) just looked at each other and mouthed, aye he did! When that nurse left the room, this arsehole started to yell, "I'll fucking banjo her, I'll knock them all out," and I couldn't help it, I said, "oh aye, let's threaten to beat up women in a hospital," but he didn't say anything. My dad was visibly angry but trying to keep his calm (he's got into fights before over patients treating nurses like shit) and he goes, "it's no worth the jail time, mate," trying to calm the situation, and this ARSEHOLE laughs, says, "I'm already in the jail," and proudly shows off the ELECTRONIC TAG ON HIS ANKLE. Utter. Wanker. He then started yelling for his medication (which wasn't even due) and when he got it he decided naw, he was going for a smoke (see: to get high). When he was gone my dad was like, "I wanna knock fuck out of him," and I was like, "not before me," and Tam was like, "what the fuck is this guy's problem?!" and we told the nurses that they didn't deserve that treatment, they don't get paid enough to be abused like that, and they should report him. I pointed out it was bad enough he was threatening nurses, but for them to be female really wound me up because of all the hard work we're doing to get equality, and they seemed to appreciate us backing them. It was fucking insane.
When we finally got to talk the doctor (who was cute af) my dad's friend, Jim, came to collect us. The doctor actually explained things a lot better, and he basically told my dad that he's annoyed because there obviously IS something wrong him but they just can't find it, so the specialists he'll see in the next few weeks will hopefully have more insight than the usual tests. The way he worded everything made it a lot easier for dad to understand, rather than just we don't know, go home. Dad actually left feeling a little better, like someone was finally understanding.
ii. On Monday I finally saw Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol 2 and I was surprised I enjoyed it so much. Some might not know, but the first movie was pretty much my favourite comic book movie EVER, but lately I've been a bit :/ because of my need to cleanse all Marvel things from my life XD Nah, it's nothing to do with my anti-Marvel stuff, and more to do with my disgust at Chris Pratt being a hunter for fun. I love Chris Pratt as an actor and he's pretty af but that just really got to me. However, I was able to push that away and enjoy his performance and fall in love with StarLord again. Okay, so Rocket will forever be my number one Guardian, but StarLord is still in there. For a while I've been getting annoyed with the marketing of the whole Baby Groot thing because the company are obviously playing on it, and I was like I BETTER NOT HAVE TO DEAL WITH TOO MUCH BABY GROOT but ten minutes in I was in love with him again XD I still prefer actual Groot, and I'm glad we'll have him back in the next movie. (I get super annoyed because in the comics Groot just re-grows super quickly, whilst the movies are like WE CAN MAKE LOTS OF MONEY ON BABY THING; I now hate myself that I loved it so much.) I definitely will be going to see it again - I saw the first one about 5 times, so we'll see how I'll go with this one.
iii. On Tuesday I went with Ryan to his medical examination. It pisses me off that you need to do all this stupid shit to prove you're mentally ill. I don't think I could cope with having to admit all that shit, and I am appreciative that he's comfortable enough to let me be in the room when he needs to talk about it. The doctor was lovely and really understanding, so I'm hoping it all went as well as we felt it did.
iv. Tomorrow (well, today, Wednesday) I'm going with my dad to speak to his counsellor (that makes them sound professional and whatnot, but it's the methadone clinic, and half these 'counsellors' know squat). I'm going to ask that she allows my dad to have his meds collected, like it we used to; for like, 20 years my mum collected them for him, then I did, but when we moved out his doctor randomly was like LOL YOU'RE OLDER AND FRAIL NOW SO YOU CAN DRINK IT IN THE CHEMIST which is just unfair. My dad is ill, anyone can see that, and expecting him to go to the chemist several times a week, drink his methadone in front of judging people all whilst he deals with his anxiety and mental health issues. Like, the very idea of it makes me angry because it's my dad and even if he pisses me off a lot, I hate that his own fucking doctor is trying to lord over him because he knows he has to do what he says. So, I will be telling his counsellor I want my brother or I to be put on the prescription to collect it, I want to know about the psychologist in the clinic, and tell them everything the doctor in the hospital said. I'll be pointing out I'm a full-time carer, have been for a long time, have dealt with mental health specialists and doctors alike, and I know what a patients rights are.
v. Thursday is my free day, so I'll most likely catch up on stuff I need to do, then on Friday I'm at Eastvale with mum for her psychiatric check up. I WILL NEVER BE FREE OF THIS STUFF, I SWEAR. (Actually, I'm considering looking into possible training/courses for this kind of thing, since I'm so in the deep end anyway!)
vi. I'm trying to catch up on my feed and stuff, so I apologise if you get comments on older posts!